Kitties!

Lookit!!!!!
Glowing kitties!!!!!!!!!

I totally want one.

The best song ever.

Good Charlotte - Misery

Take a look around
Don't you see it
See that you are the only real face in the room
No one here has a clue what your feelin'
Don't feel bad
Keep your sadness alive

Look at all these happy people
Living their lives
Look at all these plastic people
There's nothing inside
Look at all these shallow people
Telling their lies
Look at all these empty people, people

Don’t you know
That misery loves company
Yeah I heard
That misery was looking for me
Happiness, is a face that don't look good on me
Yeah I heard
That misery comes looking for me
Whoa, misery's my company
Whoa, misery is looking for me

Looking for me
The hands are up now
Everybody singing
Everybody’s movin’
They've programe their feelings
their synchronizin'
And criticizin'
Don't feel bad
Keep your sadness alive

Look at all these happy people
Living their lives
Look at all these plastic people
They're dying inside
Look at all these shallow people
Telling their lies
Look at all these empty people, people

Don't you know
That misery loves company
Yeah I heard
That misery was looking for me
Happiness, is a face that don't look good on me
Yeah I heard
That misery comes looking for me
Whoa, misery's my company
Whoa, misery is looking for me

Don't you know this misery loves me
Don't you know this misery loves me
Don't you know this misery loves me
Don't you know this misery loves me
Loves me

So you're tired of runnin'
You're tired of hurting
You're tired of living in their lie
You're tired of listening
You're tired of hurting
Keep your sadness alive, alive, alive

Don't you know
That misery loves company
Yeah I heard
That misery was looking for me
Happiness, is a face that don't look good on me
Yeah I heard
That misery comes looking for me

Don't you know
That misery loves company
Yeah I heard
Misery was looking for me
Happiness, is a face that don't look good on me
Yeah I heard
That misery comes looking for me

Whoa, misery's my company
Whoa, misery is looking for me

Doo doo doo.

Okay. So, Im listening to like, the best Enya song evah.
I Will Find You. <33
Its muchly pretty.

SO. Anyway.
My life is kinda, interesting. :p

Apparently I have to have /more/ medical tests...
And I might test out of highschool..
Go to college instead.
Which, since Im so scared of people.. Seems kinda silly.
But whatever.
It would be better than highschool, anyway.
Even though my friends...
Well, whatever.

I watched the third Pirates movie today...
It was stupid, but I totally laughed the whole time. :p
Fantastic.
"Right this way, Mrs. Fish."
And then the wedding....
"Do you take me as your husband?!" "I do!" "... Great!!"
Halfway through a massive swordfight with the fish people. xDD

Anyway.
Mater is complaining cause the guy she wanted to date and love and whatnot died...
Shes still not over that one.
:/
Poor mater.
Happened like, 4 years ago. D:

Ive been reading.. A lot.
5 books in the last 2 days.
And 6 in the last 4. :p

And now I cant wait for The Golden Compass to come out. <333
Sooooo excited.
Omg.
Omgomgomg.
You have no idea.
xD
I love that series.
My desktop is Lyra. :p
Bite me.

So anyway.
I think I might take a shower... Im bored. But.
I dont feel nice. D:

People piss me off.
Guys are bastards.
[This is in reference to my mother...]
Her 'boyfriend'... Well, Ill just say hes antisocial, against relationships, and possessive, all at once.
o.O

Alyssa, out.

"VOLDEMORTS NIPPLE!"
"Whaaaaaaaaaat?!"

ive officially gone insane.
officially, now.

im seeing fairies.
they dance and sing on my coffee table.
and they mock me.
and laugh.
and have scary faces.
and no matter where i go, they dont leave me alone.
halp.

and.
i love someone.
with all my heart.
and i think.
that he hates me.
cause.
im crazy.

not worthy to be loved, anyway.
not by anyone.
craaazyy.
fairies?

i need booze.
nao.
and we have none.
gah.

Why do i always have to think of a title..?

I randomly thought of something...

So once I was watching this movie, and they were gonna hang this guy. So, being evil bastards, they gave his daughter a gun, and said "If you can shoot the rope, your daddy will fall, and we wont kill him.", knowing shed miss.
And sure enough, she ended up killing her dad.

It was so sad.. You could tell he knew shed miss, cause she'd never fired a gun, and he was still telling her shed make it, that hed be okay...

Can you imagine...?
Ugh.
Just wanting to save your dad, and ending up killing him yourself.
So yeah, she ended rto grow up and shoot the shit out of them.
But still.

Im crying all over again. -rolls eyes-
I cry to much.

And.
Im a fucking moron.
Im going around hurting people for.. no reason, really.

I need to fucking think before I speak.
Even though I thought I did....

... My life. D:

What beauty.
False. False beauty.
Once a pretty face, marred by tears.
A red nose, swollen eyes.
Eyelashes wet, stuck into little clumps.
Its a cold night,
She pulls the blanket around her tighter.
Nothing.
Her body is chilled the bone, shaking with sobs.
What a terrible feeling.
Loss.
That places it perfectly.
Cold.
Cold.
Cold.
All she can think of is the cold,
Pulling at her skin.
A perfect sensation.
Better than pain.
Better than heat.
Better than nausea.
Cold.

Im not okay. :DDD

Okie dokie.

xD I love this song.
"Im not o-fucking-k."

Anyway.
Im hungry.
And theres no food for me to attempt to eat.
Even my ungodly collection of pudding is gone.
My brother ate it all. D:
Fat pig.

The other night.. Umm.. The 13th I think..
I wrote a super long blog post.
But its stuck on my other computer. D:
Id burn it to a disk, but that computer doesnt work that way!
Gah.
It was awesome.
Long.
Very long.
With lots of thoughts on things...
Lovely. :D

So, instead of enlightening you on what I write about at 11pm, Im eating babyfood, feeling sick and miserable.
Yay!

Oh. I went to the neurologist today.
He was a babe.
Totally.
PLUS.
Hes one of the best for like, hundreds of miles.
Ooooh wow.
He was so nice too. :D
Nice, cute, smart.. Probably rich... <33
[Im so shallow]

So.
Ummm..
What else.

Arch has a sister named Alyssa.
Thats so weird. o.O
Like.. Wtf.

And now my mother is annoying me.
While Im trying to listen to music.
And ignore her.
AND SHE WONT LET ME.
That ho.
Whats her problem. D:

By the way.
My ear wont stop hurting.
Its depressing. :p

I hate myself and I want to die. :]

Isnt that nice? DDDD:

Im tired of being sick.
My friends fail at life.
Im miserable.

Bah.

Ill add more.. Later. :[

Hungry peoples! Wee!

Okie dokie.
Not everyone is as lucky as you.
Sitting on your ass on a computer reading blogs..
Pfft.
Hell no.

So help out the hungry folks, while ENRICHING YOUR MIND.
Its a 2 for 1 deal!
Maybe hungry people /are/ better!

...
No.
They dont have CHIPS.
Heh.
Anyway.

www.freerice.com

Its all.. Vocabulary-tastic.
I stay at about level 33, and just donated 2000 grains.
What level can /you/ stay at...? How much rice can /you/ give?

[Yes, thats a challenge... Im trying to be motivational!]

Note : Its totally awesome. 10 grains for each right answer. Dooo it. :] Youll feel nice.
I just fed several small children.
That would have DIED.
Wouldn't you feel nice too?

Whooosh.

Story of my life :

[O]ccupied [J]apan -- Magnus cervi sunt in meus villa! says:
Howre you?
oh hush, puteri. xo. says:
Gooood' you?
[O]ccupied [J]apan -- Magnus cervi sunt in meus villa! says:
Sick.
[O]ccupied [J]apan -- Magnus cervi sunt in meus villa! says:
But AWESOME
[O]ccupied [J]apan -- Magnus cervi sunt in meus villa! says:
Cause neopets has the most KICKASS GAME EVER.
oh hush, puteri. xo. says:
ROFL.

So anyway.
Im super sick.
Like actually /sick/.
I have a cough and everything.
Lucky me, yeah?

Yeah.
Oh joy of joys. -rolls eyes-

I might get to go to lunch with my daddy tomorrow and have super spicy Mongolian food.
Ooooh, Id be in heaven. :D
Its be good for me, too.

:D

Simonaaaa.

Oi. That song.. I love it soooooo muuuuch.
I have it playing. :]
I think James Blunt should rule the world. ^-^;
Im still trying to understand it, though.
Im thinking Ill look up the video. :p

...

Damn.
He'll never cease to amaze me.
Watch it. Its intense.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7Cd5LwV6eg

Im gonna go back to feeling like crap now, lulz. <3

Pretty song. [:

1973
James Blunt

Simona
You're getting older
Your journey's been
Etched on your skin

Simona
Wish I had known that
What seemed so strong
Has been and gone

I would call you up everyday Saturday night
And we'd both stay out till the morning light
And we sang, "Here we go again"
And though time goes by
I will always be
In a club with you
In 1973
Singing "Here we go again"

Simona
Wish I was sober
So I could see clearly now
The rain has gone

Simona
I guess it's over
My memory plays our tune
The same old song

I would call you up everyday Saturday night
And we`d both stay out till the morning light
And we sang, "Here we go again"
And though time goes by
I will always be
In a club with you
In 1973
Singing "Here we go again"

I would call you up everyday Saturday night
And we'd both stay out till the morning light
And we sang, "Here we go again"
And though time goes by
I will always be
In a club with you
In 1973
Singing "Here we go again"

I would call you up everyday Saturday night
And we'd both stay out 'til the morning ligh
tAnd we sang, "Here we go again"
And though time goes by
I will always beIn a club with you
In 1973
Singing "Here we go again"

And though time goes by
I will always be
In a club with you
In 1973

sum non laetus. :(

Translation : I am not happy.

Now.
Since I didnt go to school, Im not allowed to use the computer.
So while mater is off doing whatever she's doing, I need to get this written. Lulz.
Yessum, I didnt go to school. Again.
God.
I fail so hard.
It makes me want to cry, really.
I only /just/ woke up. Its 3 in the afternoon. o.o;
Yeaaaahhhh.

And. Since Im not allowed to use the computer...
Im running out of things to do.
Like...
Ive read 5 books in the last 2 days.
LIke.. Woaha.

Im curious..
As to what would happen if I stopped trying to eat altogether...
Would I get all super scary skinny...?
Hmm.

Im super paranoid about my mom getting home.. :p
Whenever I hear a car door shut Im like "Onoes!"

Anyway.
Im pissed.
Thoroughly.
Because.
I have crazy people telling me all I have to do is believe Im gonna get better.
...
Right.
And once I do that, A flying pig will come and sing its congratulations. -rolls eyes-
Jesus.
Life doesnt work like that.
Ever.
Reminds me of that creepy Secret book Perry's yiayia gave my mom. -shudders-

Oh.
I feel so alone.
No one has bothered to call me.
ALL WEEK.
Really.
It makes me shiver.
I feel so.. Alone.

Plus, my friends have taken to pretending Im not there.
Like.. Ellen and Kristen were talking, and theyre like "Oh! We can tell Amanda!"
And Im sitting there like "... Riiight."
Im thinking I should give up on them.. But I couldnt do that.
Ellen and Kristen.. Ive known since Kindergarten.
Thats a /long/ time.
But, Im severely annoyed.
I keep trying to tell Ellen that...
And she just kinda ignores me.
Even though I know she knows theres /something/ up...
-sigh-

Everyone just seems so fake lately.

Magnus cervi sunt in meus villa!!!

Latin, ftw.

Yes, I can say "Large deer are in my house."
Bite me.
I bet /you/ couldn't.
Silly, silly people.

My god, I cannot type. xD

So anyway.

Im super sad, cause I didnt get to go to school today.
I wanted to.
I was really trying, actually.
Made it 3 days in a row.
I was going for the whole week.
First time in /ages/ I would have.
But noooooo.
Fucking body.
It hates me. I swear it.

So instead I slept. And read.
And slept. And read.
And slept MORE.

Made myself a quesadilla...
Accidentally poured boiling water on my arm.
Im lucky I didnt get burnt, rofl.

And, FINALLY, my internet works.
Huzzah.

:DDD

Im deviantart obsessed tonight.
:D

Its exceptionally fun, though.
Plus, Im happily being.. Alyssa-y.
Which is lovely.
Always.
;]

Ive had a good day.
I had a lovely conversation with my doctor.
Its a good thing I like the person I spend so much time with.

Batool [I think thats how she spells it..] and I decided Alex must be destroyed.
And Blue. <3
Midget Kid hugged me.
Twas random.
To the MAXXXXX.

...Yeah.

So maybe I should add a bit more to that.

Im /not/ naive, for the record.
I dont think life is all frilly and nice and lovely.
And land /does/ make a difference.
It doesnt matter what I think.
Im here. Not there.
For the record.

Fuck the girl, for all I care.
Of course I care!
Jesus.
-sob-
Why wouldnt I?!
Its like, fishing for compliments.
Only its not a compliment.
Isnt it obvious what Id think?

But Im not so naive as to say what Arch says I 'should' say.
"H'OH MY GOD NOESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS."
Wtf.
Just no.

People. Are so. Fucking. Weird.

Geez.

Where are people I need to talk to when I need them?!

jhsufhsjkhfshfshfshfuisbfushubsg.

Meh.

Ive gotten myself mad at.
Again.
WHat else is new, Alyssa?
Oh. I have a headache.
How nice.

Pretty things.

Ive decided something..
Ive been too wrapped up in the huge, terrible things in my life.
So today, Ive been trying to notice the smaller, truly beautiful things.

Beauty;;

Friends who will sing for you on msn.

A cloudy sky.

The way water drips off your fingertips in the shower.

The way two people can still care about eachother, after half a year of conflict.

The way my spider can live completely independently on my window sill.

The happiness you can feel when you realize someone really does appreciate you.

Blueberries!

Okie dokie.
So today, I was sitting in history...
Alex wouldn't even look at me... >.>
I walked over to Elizabeth [who sits right next to him..], and he still didnt look at me...

So anyway, Elizabeth was like "Whats up?"
And I just kinda looked at her and frowned, and he grabbed my hand and was like "Tis okayy..."
And she nodded over in Alex's direction, then had a questioning look, and I just sort of nodded...
And she's like "Yeah, he told me.."
And I shrugged, and we talked about how the two of us don't eat [I found someone who gets sick!]..
Shes so sweet, I love her..
She has the prettiest features, too.. Just.. Stunning.
I don't quite understand how he can /not/ like her.. Gosh.
So, back to history..
We took this test today, and yeah.
I totally didn't know any of the answers.. I didnt even have all my Cornell notes. ;-;
How the hell am I supposed to know which king was a fecking Puritan?!
And of course, Alex wouldnt look at me. The whole time.
It was terrible.. Like.. Ugh.
I hate how he acts like he never even knew me...
Buttttt!
Mr. Ratelle gave me [and only me] a starburst.
Isnt that nice?!

So, while I was sitting...
I realized the fact my relationship with Alex completely failed because of me.
Like no one has told me that... >.>
But still.
I figured it out all on my own..
I was to unwilling, subconsiously...
Damn me.
I need to tell my subconsiousness to fuck off and die.
Its ruining my life.

What else happened todayyyy...

Oh. Chris was super cute in Physics.
He helped me braid my hair. :p
And and and. He was like "Im going to break this chair over your head!"
And I looked at him funny, and he came over and hugged me, and was like "Nah, I wouldnt do that.. Youre too nice." :]
Isnt that sweet?
It made me feel super special..

Uhmmmm.
In English, Fineberg was super scary..
I swear, he'll kill us all someday. >.>
Scary.

What else...
In Latin.
We learned conjugation.
Again...
Rofl.

OH! Driver's Ed was fun..
I just cannot remember why. xD

My life is so weird.
OH. One more class.
Math.

So we had a group test..
Our group kicked ass..
Twas me, Blue, Midget Kid, Tyler, Tyler, and Mikey.
We get minus 3 for having too big a group.. xD

But anyway. We planned my funeral..
The food served will be mini bagels, pizza, watermelon, and tequila. :]

I think we failed the test, though. xD

<3

>.>

My fucking whore of a [ex]boyfriend...

After everything that has been going on, and the fact we havent even been talking...
Ughhhhh.

Okay.
So Im sitting in the car, and I get this text.
"Hey, I cant give you a ride, so meet me there at like, 8.30..."
And I was like "o.O"
And my mom goes "Thats the most fucked up thing Ive ever heard..."
Crazy ho.

But, at least were broken up now..

Then he goes "Lets just go as friends..."
And Im like "No.. Youre a cute boy, find one of those friends you make out with all the time, and go with them."
And no response, buahaha.
:]

Ill just stick with my Swiss Chocolate, whether I can actually have it or not. <333

Blah.

Tra la la..

I have nothing worthwhile to blog about...

Except that I can solve 3^(2x)=81
In math.
Yah.
Cause Im Sveeeedish.
:D

Im bugging people on MSN, listening to The Sounds, and talking on the phone. :]
Yah.
Pretty much...

Pathetic, yah?
Yah.
Yahhhhh. :d
Eyelicker!

Hmph.

You think you have something completely under control...

Okay, so thats a lie.
Ive never once thought that...
But.

Ugh.

Anyway, moving on.
I figure /one/ post that has nothing to do with the silly drama in my life might be nice.
So.
:D

----

There was this super weird guy at school today..
Blue were trying to see how close we could get to Alex without him noticing us...
And there was this sticker on a locker that said "Is it ____ta?"
Cause it had been torn, so we didn't know what it said..
So we were like "Is it ganstaaa?"
And Blue said "Yeah, cause thats gonna happen.. 'Can you go?' 'I dunno, is it gansta?'"
And I started laughing...
And then this dude randomly came up to us and was like "Did you tell her a really funny joke or something..?"
And we looked at him, and I thought she knew him, so i was like "No.. Hahah. No.. Hahahaha."
So we explained it..
And now, I think he wants to stalk us. o.o
Scary scary.

Uhm... What else...?
I dunno. XD

Orange is a pretty color. :D

Reality.

My boyfriend is hurt.
Because when he twirls my hair around his finger,
and tells me he loves me,
there is no way for me to respond.
I sit in a silence, and he turns away.
I can say nothing, because I am full of doubt.
I cannot respond, even smile in response.
He blinks, and wonders if I heard...
I nod in response.
But still say nothing.
The same doubt I had to endure,
it follows me.
I can see the pain in his eyes.
And it scares me.
I want to kiss him, want to show him that I /do/ care, my silence isn't anything against him..
And I cannot.


Im worried.
I scare myself.
Nothing seems real anymore.
Nothing moves, nothing changes.
My life seems like a dream, one I think is real.
I need proof I did something, memories are not enough.
My heart is beating fast,
yet so very slow.
Ive listened to the same song about a million times...
It soothes me.
In its sadness...

This isnt because of anything Im used to.
Its odd..
Lonely.

Sometimes...

... I cannot help but wonder...

Why life works the way it does.
Why, when you try to get over someone, you only like them more.
When you find someone you really like, something holds you back.
When you think you know whats happening, something changes.

Why when you think you're happy, you suddenly realize..
You arent.

Coldness, Indeed. :/

It was cold.
So cold.
Ugh.
I froze, I knew I would.

It was fun though..
Definetely fun.
:]

We walked from school to the beach [thats like, 3 miles...]
And then yeah..
The water was fucking cold.
Like running into ice.
Brr, much.
So then, after like, 3 minutes, we went and just sort of sat there, rofl.
By the way.
Putting pants on while a bit damp = impossible.

So then we walked back to Camino, and some cute guy in Starbucks gave me a dollar off my coffee...
Hahaha. Alex totally glared at me when I told him that.

So the football game.
I saw all these people I know... [rofl, it was hilarious. Kyle goes by, and hes like "Holy shit! Are you guys going out?!" And we were like "Uhh.. What do /you/ think?"], and there was rain running down my arms and my back, and my hair was wet, and the boyfriend was warm, the whole atmosphere was awesome..
And then, last night, Alex was talking about having Coach P as a Health teacher, and he accidentally said "Having sex with Coach P was funny."
So yeah. I got to use that a lot tonight...
"Well, at least its better then HAVING SEX WITH COACH P!" XDDD

So anyway. We won the game, for the record.

So today was good. :]

I tried not to think about anything else..
Failed.
But tried my best...

I only want to be happy.

Coldness.

The boyfriend is forcing me to go to the beach before the football game tomorrow.
And go in the water.
Im going to freeze.
My.
Ass.
Off.

He totally owes me, the ho.

Anyone who knows me knows I hate being cold.
But nooooo.
I have to go anyway.
Ugh.

Yes. Thoughts.

I cannot help but wonder.

Where people would be if everyone was perfect.
If everyone could say whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted.
If everyone could express everything they wanted.
If life was perfect, in that sense.

Life is an endless battle.
And it won't end.
Until the day I die.
And even then, it will continue.

Ill still make people cry.
Ill still underestimate the power of the things I do.
Cause no one will ever tell me.
But I wont mean to.
Ill be innocent.
Im not mean.
Im not vindictive.
Im a loving, caring, worrying person.
Everything I do, is me just trying to survive.
Trying to make sense.
Trying to be what I think people want me to be
And even then.
I fail.
Miserably.

Apparently, there is nothing to fail at.
But if there is nothing, then I fail even more.
It makes perfect sense.

However, the logic is lost.
I can make no sense of anything I think or say.
Contrary to popular belief.
I cannot even understand myself.
And damn, I try.
In every period.
Every moment.
Of every day.
I wonder.
I think.
I hope.
That someday, things will work out.
Even though they never will.
Cause not talking is the only way out.
A lie.
A terrible, terrible lie.
That could never be true.

Love.
Wanting someone to be happy.
No matter what it does to me.
Not a care in the world.
I think.
I even fail at that.
I refuse to see past myself.
Past this fog.
That I left myself in.
And no matter how much it is shaken.
I cannot get out.

Sometimes I wish.
That I didnt exist.
I have to go to school tomorrow.
And pretend to be happy.
Kiss a boy I dont love.
And try to forget.
And I wont.
Ill try.
But I wont try hard enough.
Cause I wont want to.

Alyssa's Journal : Written out.

So, while I listen to upbeat musics.
I shall copy down what I wrote in my journal earlier.
Its really just a whole page of drawings and words, with some structure.
So Ill put down what'll make sense.
A bit. :p





So it ends.
A charade.
A fantasy.
A nightmare.
Never to be forgotten.
Never wanting to remember.
A broken shard
Of a crystal shape
Rests upon cool tile.
The coldness creeping into the sparkling glass
Forgotten.
Abandoned.
Replaced.
A delicate balance,
A gentle happiness.
Destroyed.
Lost.
Done.


What could have been,
but never grew.
What could have soared,
but never flew.


Once cannot help but wonder.
What would have
Could have been.
If fate only cared,
If time only waited.


A Fleeting Moment In Time
can mean nothing.


Love.
An illusion.
A lie.
A false hope.
A dream.
That no one shall ever achieve,
but everyone will yearn for.


Illusion.
Lies.
Love.
Just a haunting memory.

Purty Houshes.

Ill write it in yellow. :]

Okie dokie.
So Cliff and I have this house, in the world of the imaginary house farm.
Its cool.
You know.

Okay.

So.

Its yellow. 2 stories. With a tower!
And, the tower's Cliff's, but whatever. Its still there.
I sleep on the window seat, so I figure its important, right?

But Im better, cause I get the master bedroom downstairs..
Its pretty..
A dusky green and a medium brown..
With pretty gold accents, and delicate leafy things.
And a stone fireplace..
All dramatic and big and cold looking.. Something I can put pictures on the mantle.
With a big, plush, cream rug. :]
And those decorative twig things you can get at Z-Gallerie.

But anyway...
The dining room is all darkwood.. The walls, the floors.. Everything.
With dark red, and peach accents.
But not too peachy.
Not like, pizza-vomit.
:D

We have a big, lush garden, with all sorts of pretty green plants, and little pebble paths, with a stone bench here and there, in the shade.
And a cobblestone driveway. And a path.
And the whole house is yellow.
With a brick first floor.
Which I think sounds really pretty. :]

Oh oh oh. And we'll have a sunroom..
With plants.
And a white iron table, so we can eat dinner out there either in summer or when it's raining...
And yeah.

Amazing, eh? ^-^

Silence.

Look, Greenie can write too.




After everything.
The insults, the lies, the silent, secret betrayal...
Lost in the comfort of soft, white fluff..
The wind howling outside the window
Sounding like voices of the dead, shrieking
Crying
Calling, for something
The book, thin pages between shaking fingers
The words gone unread
Blurred
By tears and disinterest
The cold somehow seeping in through the closed glass, the sealed door, the dormant fan..
All in silence but the howling, the rustle of the pages, and the far off bass of a song.
Slow, bored, confused thoughts.
Random people,
places,
moments,
memories...
Nothing else to think of.
But happiness.
Delusion.
Joy.
Hot tears making silent paths down flushed, fevered skin.
A path.
A mark.
Look, weve been here.
Weve claimed this as our own.
Its ours.

[de]Motivational

I got bored, so I decided Id look around on the internet for amusing things. :]

So, here we go.

http://despair.com/viewall.html

Some of my favorites :

Wishes : When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

Stupidity : Quitters never win, and winners never quit. But those who never quit AND never win are idiots.

Quality : The race for quality has no finish line, so technically its more like a death march.

Overconfidence : Before you try to beat the odds, be sure you could survive the odds beating you.

Power : Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. But it rocks absolutely, too.

Change : When the winds of change blow hard enough, the most trivial of things can become deadly projectiles.

Doubt : In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world.

Dysfunction : The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you.

Loneliness : If you find yourself struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. And yet you are alone. So very alone.

Madness : Madness does not always howl. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "Hey, is there room in your head for one more?"

Killer-Quiche!

ALyssa is listening to Rise Against, therefore she is FUCKING AMAZING.

I tried to get my mom to take me to school or 5th and 6th, but.. She wouldnt do it, lol.
Im supposed to be home sick, and Im bored [and hyper] as fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
FUCK.
Fun world, lulz.

Okay, soooo.
This morning.
I slept a bit..
/Someone/ texted me at 4.30.. What a moron. "Are you awake?"
"NO IM NOT AWAKE!"
But I was asleep..
So I couldnt say anything. <3

Thennnnn I woke up at about 9.30, got some water, and grabbed my book on painting clouds and Ellen's graduation present...
Read the book, went through the present... "Gotta love those shrimps!"
I was all happy, lol.

Then I read my diary, and wrote in it a bit.
Made me a bit sad..
Hmph.

Ive texted a lot...
Random things. XD
Dreams about engagement...
:]

I wanted to go to school so I could tell Mr. Long I was obtuse, but.. Meh. :/

Ellen is transferring into my History class.
Woot!
I ish teh happieeeee!

Weeeee. Music.
Weeeee. Quiches.
Weeeee. Wee!

Weee.

3rd post in one night.
What a dork.
But.
This song.
Is amazing.
And I love it.
SO MUCH.
Ugh.
Its like, wow.
Amazing.

Swing Life Away
Rise Against

Am I loud and clear or am I breaking up?
Am I still your charm or am I just bad luck?
Are we getting closer, are we just getting more lost?
I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words


We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand


I've been here so long; think that its time to move
The winter's so cold summer's over too soon
So let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
But we've had some times
I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go


We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand


swing life away
swing life away
swing life away
swing life away