So, while I listen to upbeat musics.
I shall copy down what I wrote in my journal earlier.
Its really just a whole page of drawings and words, with some structure.
So Ill put down what'll make sense.
A bit. :p
So it ends.
A charade.
A fantasy.
A nightmare.
Never to be forgotten.
Never wanting to remember.
A broken shard
Of a crystal shape
Rests upon cool tile.
The coldness creeping into the sparkling glass
Forgotten.
Abandoned.
Replaced.
A delicate balance,
A gentle happiness.
Destroyed.
Lost.
Done.
What could have been,
but never grew.
What could have soared,
but never flew.
Once cannot help but wonder.
What would have
Could have been.
If fate only cared,
If time only waited.
A Fleeting Moment In Time
can mean nothing.
Love.
An illusion.
A lie.
A false hope.
A dream.
That no one shall ever achieve,
but everyone will yearn for.
Illusion.
Lies.
Love.
Just a haunting memory.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Purty Houshes.
Ill write it in yellow. :]
Okie dokie.
So Cliff and I have this house, in the world of the imaginary house farm.
Its cool.
You know.
Okay.
So.
Its yellow. 2 stories. With a tower!
And, the tower's Cliff's, but whatever. Its still there.
I sleep on the window seat, so I figure its important, right?
But Im better, cause I get the master bedroom downstairs..
Its pretty..
A dusky green and a medium brown..
With pretty gold accents, and delicate leafy things.
And a stone fireplace..
All dramatic and big and cold looking.. Something I can put pictures on the mantle.
With a big, plush, cream rug. :]
And those decorative twig things you can get at Z-Gallerie.
But anyway...
The dining room is all darkwood.. The walls, the floors.. Everything.
With dark red, and peach accents.
But not too peachy.
Not like, pizza-vomit.
:D
We have a big, lush garden, with all sorts of pretty green plants, and little pebble paths, with a stone bench here and there, in the shade.
And a cobblestone driveway. And a path.
And the whole house is yellow.
With a brick first floor.
Which I think sounds really pretty. :]
Oh oh oh. And we'll have a sunroom..
With plants.
And a white iron table, so we can eat dinner out there either in summer or when it's raining...
And yeah.
Amazing, eh? ^-^
Okie dokie.
So Cliff and I have this house, in the world of the imaginary house farm.
Its cool.
You know.
Okay.
So.
Its yellow. 2 stories. With a tower!
And, the tower's Cliff's, but whatever. Its still there.
I sleep on the window seat, so I figure its important, right?
But Im better, cause I get the master bedroom downstairs..
Its pretty..
A dusky green and a medium brown..
With pretty gold accents, and delicate leafy things.
And a stone fireplace..
All dramatic and big and cold looking.. Something I can put pictures on the mantle.
With a big, plush, cream rug. :]
And those decorative twig things you can get at Z-Gallerie.
But anyway...
The dining room is all darkwood.. The walls, the floors.. Everything.
With dark red, and peach accents.
But not too peachy.
Not like, pizza-vomit.
:D
We have a big, lush garden, with all sorts of pretty green plants, and little pebble paths, with a stone bench here and there, in the shade.
And a cobblestone driveway. And a path.
And the whole house is yellow.
With a brick first floor.
Which I think sounds really pretty. :]
Oh oh oh. And we'll have a sunroom..
With plants.
And a white iron table, so we can eat dinner out there either in summer or when it's raining...
And yeah.
Amazing, eh? ^-^
Friday, October 05, 2007
Silence.
Look, Greenie can write too.
After everything.
The insults, the lies, the silent, secret betrayal...
Lost in the comfort of soft, white fluff..
The wind howling outside the window
Sounding like voices of the dead, shrieking
Crying
Calling, for something
The book, thin pages between shaking fingers
The words gone unread
Blurred
By tears and disinterest
The cold somehow seeping in through the closed glass, the sealed door, the dormant fan..
All in silence but the howling, the rustle of the pages, and the far off bass of a song.
Slow, bored, confused thoughts.
Random people,
places,
moments,
memories...
Nothing else to think of.
But happiness.
Delusion.
Joy.
Hot tears making silent paths down flushed, fevered skin.
A path.
A mark.
Look, weve been here.
Weve claimed this as our own.
Its ours.
After everything.
The insults, the lies, the silent, secret betrayal...
Lost in the comfort of soft, white fluff..
The wind howling outside the window
Sounding like voices of the dead, shrieking
Crying
Calling, for something
The book, thin pages between shaking fingers
The words gone unread
Blurred
By tears and disinterest
The cold somehow seeping in through the closed glass, the sealed door, the dormant fan..
All in silence but the howling, the rustle of the pages, and the far off bass of a song.
Slow, bored, confused thoughts.
Random people,
places,
moments,
memories...
Nothing else to think of.
But happiness.
Delusion.
Joy.
Hot tears making silent paths down flushed, fevered skin.
A path.
A mark.
Look, weve been here.
Weve claimed this as our own.
Its ours.
[de]Motivational
I got bored, so I decided Id look around on the internet for amusing things. :]
So, here we go.
http://despair.com/viewall.html
Some of my favorites :
Wishes : When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
Stupidity : Quitters never win, and winners never quit. But those who never quit AND never win are idiots.
Quality : The race for quality has no finish line, so technically its more like a death march.
Overconfidence : Before you try to beat the odds, be sure you could survive the odds beating you.
Power : Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. But it rocks absolutely, too.
Change : When the winds of change blow hard enough, the most trivial of things can become deadly projectiles.
Doubt : In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world.
Dysfunction : The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you.
Loneliness : If you find yourself struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. And yet you are alone. So very alone.
Madness : Madness does not always howl. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "Hey, is there room in your head for one more?"
So, here we go.
http://despair.com/viewall.html
Some of my favorites :
Wishes : When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
Stupidity : Quitters never win, and winners never quit. But those who never quit AND never win are idiots.
Quality : The race for quality has no finish line, so technically its more like a death march.
Overconfidence : Before you try to beat the odds, be sure you could survive the odds beating you.
Power : Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. But it rocks absolutely, too.
Change : When the winds of change blow hard enough, the most trivial of things can become deadly projectiles.
Doubt : In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world.
Dysfunction : The only consistent feature in all of your dissatisfying relationships is you.
Loneliness : If you find yourself struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. And yet you are alone. So very alone.
Madness : Madness does not always howl. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "Hey, is there room in your head for one more?"
Killer-Quiche!
ALyssa is listening to Rise Against, therefore she is FUCKING AMAZING.
I tried to get my mom to take me to school or 5th and 6th, but.. She wouldnt do it, lol.
Im supposed to be home sick, and Im bored [and hyper] as fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
FUCK.
Fun world, lulz.
Okay, soooo.
This morning.
I slept a bit..
/Someone/ texted me at 4.30.. What a moron. "Are you awake?"
"NO IM NOT AWAKE!"
But I was asleep..
So I couldnt say anything. <3
Thennnnn I woke up at about 9.30, got some water, and grabbed my book on painting clouds and Ellen's graduation present...
Read the book, went through the present... "Gotta love those shrimps!"
I was all happy, lol.
Then I read my diary, and wrote in it a bit.
Made me a bit sad..
Hmph.
Ive texted a lot...
Random things. XD
Dreams about engagement...
:]
I wanted to go to school so I could tell Mr. Long I was obtuse, but.. Meh. :/
Ellen is transferring into my History class.
Woot!
I ish teh happieeeee!
Weeeee. Music.
Weeeee. Quiches.
Weeeee. Wee!
I tried to get my mom to take me to school or 5th and 6th, but.. She wouldnt do it, lol.
Im supposed to be home sick, and Im bored [and hyper] as fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
FUCK.
Fun world, lulz.
Okay, soooo.
This morning.
I slept a bit..
/Someone/ texted me at 4.30.. What a moron. "Are you awake?"
"NO IM NOT AWAKE!"
But I was asleep..
So I couldnt say anything. <3
Thennnnn I woke up at about 9.30, got some water, and grabbed my book on painting clouds and Ellen's graduation present...
Read the book, went through the present... "Gotta love those shrimps!"
I was all happy, lol.
Then I read my diary, and wrote in it a bit.
Made me a bit sad..
Hmph.
Ive texted a lot...
Random things. XD
Dreams about engagement...
:]
I wanted to go to school so I could tell Mr. Long I was obtuse, but.. Meh. :/
Ellen is transferring into my History class.
Woot!
I ish teh happieeeee!
Weeeee. Music.
Weeeee. Quiches.
Weeeee. Wee!
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Weee.
3rd post in one night.
What a dork.
But.
This song.
Is amazing.
And I love it.
SO MUCH.
Ugh.
Its like, wow.
Amazing.
What a dork.
But.
This song.
Is amazing.
And I love it.
SO MUCH.
Ugh.
Its like, wow.
Amazing.
Swing Life Away
Rise Against
Am I loud and clear or am I breaking up?
Am I still your charm or am I just bad luck?
Are we getting closer, are we just getting more lost?
I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words
We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand
I've been here so long; think that its time to move
The winter's so cold summer's over too soon
So let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
But we've had some times
I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go
We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand
swing life away
swing life away
swing life away
swing life away
Rise Against
Am I loud and clear or am I breaking up?
Am I still your charm or am I just bad luck?
Are we getting closer, are we just getting more lost?
I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words
We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand
I've been here so long; think that its time to move
The winter's so cold summer's over too soon
So let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow
I've got some friends, some that I hardly know
But we've had some times
I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go
We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand
swing life away
swing life away
swing life away
swing life away
I FIGURED IT OUT.
Obtuse:
1. not quick or alert in perception, feeling, or intellect; not sensitive or observant; dull.
2. not sharp, acute, or pointed; blunt in form.
3. (of a leaf, petal, etc.) rounded at the extremity.
4. indistinctly felt or perceived, as pain or sound.
....
Cliff, youre such a ho. :p
But.
[21:26] Wrathofdecision: So you should ask him why he was calling you "rounded at the extremity".
-cackles-
1. not quick or alert in perception, feeling, or intellect; not sensitive or observant; dull.
2. not sharp, acute, or pointed; blunt in form.
3. (of a leaf, petal, etc.) rounded at the extremity.
4. indistinctly felt or perceived, as pain or sound.
....
Cliff, youre such a ho. :p
But.
[21:26] Wrathofdecision: So you should ask him why he was calling you "rounded at the extremity".
-cackles-
Tonight, Tonight
The title doesnt make sense to me either, so if you ask, Ill shoot you. :]
Its probably just cause Im listening to Tonight Tonight by Smashing Pumpkins right now. :p
Good song. :]
Soooo. Today.
I was home sick.
How sad. ;--;
I missed the really depressing assembly, apparently.
Ellen says it makes her want to hug people...
Lulz.
HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG THE PENGUINS.
Soooo..
I dont know.
Im all giggly, lol.
I hate that..
It makes me feel so girly.
Im like "AHEEHEEHEE CUTE BOI!!111oneoneoen"
:p
The price I pay for having a vagina.
Omg. So today I was reading HP comics [yeah, i was bored, okay?]
And there was this one...
"WHat was that whole conversation for anyway...?"
"Breaking the ice.."
"WHat the hell for?!"
"Suprise buttsecks."
"o.O"
I was giggling hysterically. :p
o.O
I just learned something super scary..
Okay.
So I was talking to Eric, and I was like "Oh, I love Chinese food, heehee."
And hes like "Yeah, I know, my dad told me.."
So that means XiaoMing randomly went home and was like "Hey, guess what? Brians daughter likes Chinese food!"
Honestly..
How messed up is that.
So CREEPY.
Ugh.
Crazy asians. -shudders-
:D
Its cute that people randomly talk about me though.
Makes me feel loved and popularrrrr.
XD
Oh.
Okay.
So my new adjective for myself is "Obtuse."
And my Grandma too..
We were talking about it, lol.
So tomorrow when I go into math...
Alyssa : "Hi Mr. Long!"
Mr. Long : "Hey.."
Alyssa : "How are you today?"
Mr. Long : "Good, and you?"
Alyssa : "Obtuse..."
Mr. Long : "o.O"
An obtuse Greenie, signing off. :]
Its probably just cause Im listening to Tonight Tonight by Smashing Pumpkins right now. :p
Good song. :]
Soooo. Today.
I was home sick.
How sad. ;--;
I missed the really depressing assembly, apparently.
Ellen says it makes her want to hug people...
Lulz.
HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG THE PENGUINS.
Soooo..
I dont know.
Im all giggly, lol.
I hate that..
It makes me feel so girly.
Im like "AHEEHEEHEE CUTE BOI!!111oneoneoen"
:p
The price I pay for having a vagina.
Omg. So today I was reading HP comics [yeah, i was bored, okay?]
And there was this one...
"WHat was that whole conversation for anyway...?"
"Breaking the ice.."
"WHat the hell for?!"
"Suprise buttsecks."
"o.O"
I was giggling hysterically. :p
o.O
I just learned something super scary..
Okay.
So I was talking to Eric, and I was like "Oh, I love Chinese food, heehee."
And hes like "Yeah, I know, my dad told me.."
So that means XiaoMing randomly went home and was like "Hey, guess what? Brians daughter likes Chinese food!"
Honestly..
How messed up is that.
So CREEPY.
Ugh.
Crazy asians. -shudders-
:D
Its cute that people randomly talk about me though.
Makes me feel loved and popularrrrr.
XD
Oh.
Okay.
So my new adjective for myself is "Obtuse."
And my Grandma too..
We were talking about it, lol.
So tomorrow when I go into math...
Alyssa : "Hi Mr. Long!"
Mr. Long : "Hey.."
Alyssa : "How are you today?"
Mr. Long : "Good, and you?"
Alyssa : "Obtuse..."
Mr. Long : "o.O"
An obtuse Greenie, signing off. :]
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
POOFINH [pt. 2]
Well, alrighty.
I just love it when youve been going on a truth for several weeks, then all of the sudden its like "BAM. Sorry, you lose."
I mean, I suppose Im happy I kinda know whats going on..
Lol.
Keeps me from losing my mind..
And I was right.
Hurrah, for sticking up for people when you know how they really are.
Too random not to make sense... :]
Ah well.. So apparently, Im not allowed.
Which is ridiculously unfair...
Oh well.
Theres nothing to do about it. ;-;
Even though everyone here is a man-ho.
Shucks.
Anyway.
So today...
I dont know.. I cant even remember what happened today.
I was in total zombie mode..
Apparently I got a 105 on my Latin test...
I dont think I failed Math...
And I dont know where the brake is in a car. How sad. :/
I got my school pictures. :p
They were in the Greek, and I pretty much walked by Amanda and Ellen and Kristen, totally ignoring them.
I felt so bad...
I wanted to cry.
And then in History.. I dont know.. Alex was being.. Alex-ish.
Whateverrrrrr.
Im confused..
My life is super odd.
I wish it was easy.
Damn.
I just love it when youve been going on a truth for several weeks, then all of the sudden its like "BAM. Sorry, you lose."
I mean, I suppose Im happy I kinda know whats going on..
Lol.
Keeps me from losing my mind..
And I was right.
Hurrah, for sticking up for people when you know how they really are.
Too random not to make sense... :]
Ah well.. So apparently, Im not allowed.
Which is ridiculously unfair...
Oh well.
Theres nothing to do about it. ;-;
Even though everyone here is a man-ho.
Shucks.
Anyway.
So today...
I dont know.. I cant even remember what happened today.
I was in total zombie mode..
Apparently I got a 105 on my Latin test...
I dont think I failed Math...
And I dont know where the brake is in a car. How sad. :/
I got my school pictures. :p
They were in the Greek, and I pretty much walked by Amanda and Ellen and Kristen, totally ignoring them.
I felt so bad...
I wanted to cry.
And then in History.. I dont know.. Alex was being.. Alex-ish.
Whateverrrrrr.
Im confused..
My life is super odd.
I wish it was easy.
Damn.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
POOFINH
Fidelity
Regina Spektor
I never loved nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting my heart truly
I got lost in the sounds
I hear in my mind
All of these voices
I hear in my mind all of these words
I hear in my mind all of this music
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
when it breaks my heart
Suppose I never, ever met you
Suppose we never fell in love
Suppose I never, ever let you kiss me so sweet and so soft
Suppose I never, ever saw you
Suppose you never, ever called
Suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall
Just to break my fall
Just to break my fall
Just to break my fall
Break my fall
Break my fall
All my friends say that of course it's gonna get better
Gonna get better
Better better better better better better better
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Regina Spektor
I never loved nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting my heart truly
I got lost in the sounds
I hear in my mind
All of these voices
I hear in my mind all of these words
I hear in my mind all of this music
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
when it breaks my heart
Suppose I never, ever met you
Suppose we never fell in love
Suppose I never, ever let you kiss me so sweet and so soft
Suppose I never, ever saw you
Suppose you never, ever called
Suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall
Just to break my fall
Just to break my fall
Just to break my fall
Break my fall
Break my fall
All my friends say that of course it's gonna get better
Gonna get better
Better better better better better better better
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pretty song...
Ill add more, as soon as I address a letter and write Aaron a note. :/
Ill add more, as soon as I address a letter and write Aaron a note. :/
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)